This post has not been edited by the GamesBeat staff. Opinions by GamesBeat community writers do not necessarily reflect those of the staff.
We game journalists are kind of a big deal. We have the ability to help sell a game through the power of the box quote, positive quips taken by us and then slapped to the back of a box by a publisher.
Well, I've decided to do the industry a great favor and arrange some free box quotes based on the things I was saying about some of E3's biggest titles. You're welcome, video games.
Hey, it worked for Red Dead Redemption!
“This makes the original Bioshock look like Doom.”
-Mike Minotti of Bitmob on Bioshock Infinite
“Thank God this doesn’t suck.”
-Mike Minotti of Bitmob on Sonic Generations
“Absolutely, incredibly intuitive motion controls during the 50 percent of the time that they work.”
-Mike Minotti of Bitmob on The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword
“The same dragon has never killed me five times in five minutes during one demo.”
-Mike Minotti of Bitmob on Dark Souls
“At this point, I half expect the narrator to say something if I leave to take a piss.”
-Mike Minotti of Bitmob on Bastion
“Are you sure you guys made Prey? Did you make a deal with the devil to create the best game ever or something?”
-Mike Minotti of Bitmob on Prey 2
“This game sucks, but it's the best sucking game I’ve ever played.”
-Mike Minotti of Bitmob on Luigi’s Mansion 2