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Line-waiting Apple fanatics rush to grab new iPhones in annual rite of commercial self-flagellation

The original iPhone line, June 29, 2007.

Image Credit: Flickr/Alex C

New iPhones. Same lines.

After eight years of watching people line up for new iPhones, what is there left to say?

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Let’s just go right to the social media and enjoy the nonsense.

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Hey, we might die, but that 3D Touch feature looks totally awesome!

Remember, no matter how rough your morning was today, at least you didn’t have to stay up all night getting the store ready and then still muster enough energy to perform the required clapping and cheering to impress Apple customers.

No matter how many times I read about the person who had a robot stand in line, the only thing I can think is: How did someone not put their fist through the screen?

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Behold, and despair.

No. I’m not.

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Perhaps the only thing that could make all of this even sadder….

A source close to the British tells me this is god-damn hilarious:

https://twitter.com/larakiara/status/647333747143122944

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Honestly, I don’t even know what is going on here.

The iPhone line in the U.S. capitol was particularly astonishing:

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Now, unbox your iPhones. Hit your iCloud restore. And then let’s get ready to do this all over again next year.

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