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CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA—At approximately 9:30 last night, police were summoned to resolve a disturbance reported at a local home that was hosting a Halloween costume party. When they arrived at the scene, the authorities were surprised to find a man, later identified as Richard Henderson, age 22, running about the house in a panic and shouting delusional statements about a zombie invasion.
Henderson in costume
“None of us could recognize him at first,” Milward said. Dressed as a Vietnam War veteran, wearing a grey beard, and only referring to himself as “Bill,” Henderson calmly helped himself to some punch and began to casually chat with the host and other guests. “It wasn’t until his voice started to squeak that we realized it was Richard in costume.” The party-goers all had a laugh after discovering his identity, and they continued socializing for about a half-hour.
Then the zombies arrived.
“Jake, Laurence, Tim, and Rachel all showed up at the same time dressed as zombies,” Milward told the reporters. “They had torn clothing, fake blood, you name it. Those were probably the best costumes we saw all night.”
Jake, Laurence, Tim, and Rachel as they approached the party (corpses added for effect)
Apparently, “Bill” also thought the guests were very realistically-dressed, as he ran to the other end of the room shouting, “Here come the infected!” Everyone present had a good laugh, and they were about to resume their conversations when Henderson continued his rant. “Weapons over here!” he shouted as he grabbed a plastic sword and lunged at Rachel.
“From the bruise on Rachel’s head, we were all beginning to tell that Richard was serious,” said Milward. “If that wasn’t enough of an indicator of his mental breakdown, the next thing he did certainly was.”
Tossing the sword off to the side, Henderson made his way to the corner of the room filled with Halloween decorations, which included a couple ghosts being blown by a fan, a glowing witch’s cauldron, and bats handing from the ceiling. Picking up a portable strobe light, he yelled, “Grenades over here!” and hurled it across the room, just over the zombies’ heads.
“He kind of looked confused as to why the ‘infected’ didn’t run toward the flashing light, but that didn’t stop his next plan. Grabbing a bottle of soda from a table, he stuffed a napkin halfway through the opening and lit it with a nearby candle. After yelling ‘Molotov here!’ he threw it at our feet. Of course it was a plastic bottle, so it didn’t shatter on the ground or anything, but the soda sure made a mess.”
At this point, Milward called the police and Henderson was escorted off of the property. Police told reporters that it took over an hour for him to calm down enough to give them his real name, rather than “Bill.” He was examined by a psychiatrist, who determined that Richard had Dissociative Identity Disorder, and believed he was a survivor of a zombie apocalypse after playing a game on his computer.
“I’ve always said that these games were no good for people,” explained the psychiatrist. “With all of these stories about games inspiring kids to be violent and commit crimes, I just knew it was only a matter of time before someone took zombie attacks seriously.”