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Guitar

Day 1

My wife and I moved into a small, three-bedroom house today. We wasted no time converting one of the spare bedrooms into an office for me and the other into an art studio for her.

Although our house came furnished, we purchased some additional electronics. Since I'm a computer whiz, the first item on our list was a computer.

While we tried out our new gadgets, one of our new neighbors came to visit. Instead of talking, she promptly walked into our living room and proceeded to play her guitar for nearly eight hours. We had to politely ask her to leave, so we could get some rest.


Day 2

My wife and I decided it would be a good idea to start looking for jobs, since we have a very limited pool of funds left to live on. I landed a position as a test subject in a laboratory, which gave me a good start toward my lifetime wish of becoming a robot-creature crossbreeder. Even the best mad scientists have to start somewhere.

 

Day 3

I got up in the morning and started preparing for my first day of work. I put breakfast in the oven, and then I decided I had to use the bathroom. Apparently, I spent longer in the bathroom than I had intended, because my carpool showed up. I quickly changed my clothes and ran out the door. 

A rather loud fire alarm woke my wife. Thankfully, the fire only managed to destroy the oven before firefighters put it out. When we discussed this later in the day, I feigned ignorance and bemoaned cheap appliances.

Fire

While I was gone, my wife accepted a job delivering papers. It's not the most illustrious start, but she's going to work on becoming a famous author.


Day 4

My wife's work schedule has her getting up really early in the morning. She was kind enough to clog the toilet and leave it for me when I got up. Good thing I'm handy with these sorts of things.

After we both got home from work, I strongly felt that going to bed at 4 p.m. was a good idea. I woke up at midnight, played on the computer a little, and served dinner at 3:15 a.m.. We ate together, and my wife decided to take a bath before going to work. I chose to sleep for a few more hours.


Day 5

I got up again in the wee hours of the morning and thought it was a good time to read a fantasy novel. The book was so good, I almost missed work.

When we both returned home again, we discovered a mystery on our kitchen table in the form of a pizza box. We found this interesting because neither of us ever ordered a pizza.

I logged on and chatted on the computer for most of the night, and my wife went to bed in frustration. Over the next six hours, I the only thing useful that I discovered was that most of the other women in the neighborhood are single.


Day 6

Toilet

I woke up in the morning to an empty house and another clogged toilet. I'm starting to wonder if she's doing this on purpose.

I'm sick of cleaning up her messes, so I decided to use the toilet without unclogging it first. After I flushed, it left a nice flood on the bathroom floor.

Much to my chagrin, the lady from the maid service cleaned up the flood before my wife got home. We also discovered the source of the phantom pizza box when our hidden cameras recorded the maid eating our ice cream and leaving the container on our table. Naturally, she did this after she cleaned the rest of the house.

The maid left us with another parting gift as well: a broken dishwasher. I think I should send the appliance repair bill to the cleaning service.


Day 7

Thanks to some extra studying on the side, my wife got a promotion at work to Automated Spell-Checker Checker today. At my suggestion, we used the bonus from her promotion to purchase a toilet that is less likely to clog.

My obsession with the computer came to a temporary end as smoke started billowing from it while I was trying to play a video game.

My wife and I managed to go to bed at the same time tonight. She tried to get frisky with me, but I guess I was too tired because I fell asleep. I'm not looking forward to having that conversation in the morning.

Frisky


The preceding events are a chronicle of time I spent with the PS3 version of The Sims 3. Although I was initially skeptical of this title because of some of the past console versions of The Sims series, this release truly does replicate the full PC Sims experience. Now that EA has included full-featured customization tools and integrated online features that allow you to share and download creations without leaving the game, console owners can now play The Sims without feeling inferior to their PC counterparts.