Mario Sports Mix should have been awesome based on its title alone. The one genre I will not touch is sports, unless my favorite plumber is involved. I make exceptions for more whimsical entries like NFL Blitz and NBA Jam because they, like Mario, don't take themselves too seriously. The only reason I would ever opt to play football or basketball on TV instead of outside is so I can dropkick downed players or shatter the backboard with a vicious dunk.
Unfortunately, Mario Sports Mix takes many of fun elements we associate with the franchise and fails to execute them properly. A number of the game's critics claim this looks like the end of Mario's long legacy of acclaimed sports titles. I fear they may be right.
Rather than focusing on creating a wacky take on a single sport, Mario Sports Mix offers four games to choose from: basketball, hockey, volleyball, and dodgeball. Despite their differences, however, each one features the same intuitive control scheme. Swinging the Wii remote will always execute the scoring motion regardless of what you're playing, allowing anyone to jump in and start shooting for the goal.
The simplicity grows old fast, though, as you find yourself doing the same things over and over in each sport. In classic Mario Kart tradition, stages attempt to change up the monotony with themed obstacles. Ghosts steal the ball in Luigi's mansion, and traffic cones replace goalies in Toad's skating rink, conveniently located within a go-kart track. Items are also available for players to lay out traps while on defense or for launching deadly shots on offense. The only quirk that really adds to the tension is the use of coins. Scoring while you have coins saved up nets extra points as well as a target on your head. Most items are a minor inconvenience, but when multiple points are on the line, emptying a player's pockets with a well-aimed koopa shell can turn the tide of any game in your favor.
Another interesting draw is Mario Sports Mix's eclectic cast of characters. Of course, all the regulars are there (including Waluigi and Daisy who seem doomed to do nothing but play sports), but developer Square-Enix threw in a few of its own familiar faces. Having grown bored with choosing from just Mario and friends for nearly 20 years, I rushed to unlock characters like Final Fantasy's ninja and black mage and Dragon Quest's slime. To my extreme disappointment, the game locks the cameos behind its boring tournament mode. As expected, you work your way through the brackets playing other teams on progressively dangerous stages. The problem is that each game consists of two three-minute halves. When you're up 17 by the end of the first half, you'll wish Square-Enix had the foresight to program a mercy rule.
What's worse is that you're only punishing yourself by continuing to play, because each time you score, the clock stops so the Lakitu referee can take his good old time resetting the ball. Consequently, my strategy involved quickly taking the lead before escaping off to odd corners of the stage to run down the clock. The ultimate insult is discovering that you have to unlock each character individually for each sport.
Mario Sports Mix can be fun, at least for a little while. Friends and family can quickly jump in and have a blast thanks to the familiar rules, simple controls, and lack of difficulty, but even they will grow bored with each game's shallow take on the real deal. They fall somewhere in between the frantic simplicity of a mini-game and the rewarding, skill-based fun of a full-blown sport. I'm just not sure that anyone wants to walk that line for very long.