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[Checks wrist to make sure it’s midnight. Reminded that my current watch is just fine.]
Today I didn’t order an Apple Watch. I couldn’t not help myself.
There I was, a millennial with a watch, checking in on the Apple Watch launch site UX. And I didn’t buy one.
Yes, I could use it to send my heartbeat to someone. But the only friend of mine buying one is this guy. I don’t want to send that guy my heartbeat.
Sure, I kind of want one. Everyone seems to kind of want one. Sometimes I imagine which one I’d buy. Guess which one? This one:
Just look at it up there. It’s beautiful. But there is no way in hell I’m buying that one. I would look ridiculous wearing it. I can’t pull off gold like that. I’m a winter. I’m also not a millionaire, or even a moderately well-paid person living outside New York City.
This is the one I’d have to settle for:
This one. The iPhone 5C of watches. No thanks, Apple.
I’ll definitely buy the next one, though.
Gerhard Stiene contributed to this report.
